Should you keep your options open when dating becomes a relationship

should you keep your options open when dating becomes a relationship

While some people make their intentions known and agree to becoming When someone wants to date others, they'll leave one of the weekend nights available. When you're excited about being together every weekend, you should know He's ready for an exclusive relationship because he's not keeping any doors open. How long should you date for before you make your relationship official? Everything has become a little ill-defined, and I wouldn't be surprised if you've asked to stay monogamous from the start, while others like to keep their options open. The thought of dating other men when you're already in a relationship feels wrong Women have been taught since childhood to believe that becoming a man's “girlfriend” Keeping your options open and focusing on what you need will.

Despite their masked reasons, in my opinion men are just better protectors of their hearts than women. So to avoid disappointment and heartache they date a few women. And if not ready to pursue the next step with one special woman…. To avoid the risk of total loss….

should you keep your options open when dating becomes a relationship

We as women aspire to meet and become exclusive with a special gent as well. But sometimes, we may also have personal matters to deal with, recently out of a relationship or are career focused.

We currently cannot give a man all the attention that he needs or have the time to address all the emotional aspects of a relationship. So we prefer to establish friendships with a possible plus one at a social event. Or we as well are just as picky. Timing of our interests and the men we pursue is often off. When we are ready it is typically out of sync with the other person wants.

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So why the man we date may not be ready for exclusivity…we begin to date other men and give them an opportunity to shine and pursue our heart.

So us woman sometimes may have our heart with one person but understand that exclusivity is not discussed. Therefore, there is a risk that the gent we have interest in is possibly dating others…so this is an open playing field for us as well. We sometimes…like men, we keep the man where our heart lies in the mix…who knows when that person will be ready. Nothing is wrong with the guy to completely cut him out of your life…the timing is just not in sync.

should you keep your options open when dating becomes a relationship

So why not maintain a friendship and just let life flow? There is a point where timing does match and after getting to know one another over a period of time, both are ready to discuss exclusivity. Let the relationship naturally mature. Think of it as an adventure and if it doesn't lead to a wedding day, you will have had fun along the way and hopefully some great stories to share.

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Seeing what you want to see instead of what's there. Chris Rock says that in the beginning of a relationship "you never meet the true person you meet their representative. To keep from being hurt over and over again, you must be willing recognize and embrace the facts as they are and not interject your own romantic notations and fairy tales into the situation.

To begin the process, ask yourself, "What is the truth about the person and the potential relationship? The sad truth is they consciously or unconsciously chose to overlook the obvious. They chose to look over bad boy ways, affairs, drinking problems, drug problems, gambling problems, domestic violence, irresponsible parenting, disappearing acts, obvious lies, uncaring behavior, prison records, love triangles, bi-sexual activities and Deal Breakers of every kind.

When it comes to relationships ignorance is not bliss. To see what is really there you have to ask the right questions, read the signs, do the research, recognize the truth and know when you are being told what you want to hear rather than the truth. Don't be so enamored with the representative that your common sense takes a vacation and your ability to reason and think critically is lost. Use all your senses and see what is in front of you regardless of how he may try to camouflage the truth.

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Look past the representative and discern the true essence of your potential partner. If in doubt make sure your closest friends or family members meets him.

They will often see what you cannot see and will tell you those things you need to, but don't want to hear. Allowing yourself to become a docking station, when his battery is low. One of the best parts of a good relationship is great sex. It is a perfectly normal part of a relationship, but there is a time and appropriateness for sex. Do not allow yourself to be a docking station just because you are lonely and he needs a place to plug in. This points to desperation and will never make a man love you.

Men are not moved by sex.

should you keep your options open when dating becomes a relationship

They are moved by what they feel for the woman they are having sex with. If your relationship has not developed to at least a mutual respect and admiration level, let him dock his appliances somewhere else.

The Dating Game: Exclusivity vs. Keeping Options Open | Happily Divorced and After

Before you let a guy charge his battery at your docking station, make sure that you are not just any docking station around the city. If his battery is low, he won't care whose charger or docking station he uses. Of course, he's not likely to tell you that you are just any docking station, it is up to you to unearth the truth and discover if he has affection for you or if you are merely an avenue to get his appliance charged.

Think about it, when you need a charge anything goes. I've asked perfect strangers in an airport if they had a charger that would fit my phone or electronic device. And men looking for emotionless non-committal sex will do the same thing in any nightclub, restaurant, sporting event or airport.

In desperate times a docking station is only a docking station until you find your personal charger. If you skip the logical progression of steps you can become the community docking station. Relax, slow down and do your best to only charge the appliances that you are familiar with.

should you keep your options open when dating becomes a relationship

Not communicating your feelings Healthy relationships are about effectively communicating, getting on the same page and enjoying and loving each other.

The best way to get the relationship you want is to openly and honestly articulate your needs to your partner and to listen to his wants and needs. Most men I know are not mind readers. And believe it or not, when they ask, "What's wrong? Men think differently, react differently, and process events and situations differently. And when it comes to a woman's logic, emotions and feelings, most men do not have a clue!

I learned this lesson from my best friend who often asks, "Can you translate this situation for me, because I don't speak woman-ease. When I take the time to present a woman's perspective to him logically and calmly he gets it and sets out to address the offending behavior. He is a quick study and when he knows what's wrong he makes every effort to make her happy, because he loves her. Ask for what you want.

If you are upset, express your upset clearly and stay on the topic of what you are currently upset about.